(Exclusive! An ex-oligarch and his favorite ex-bogeyman are overheard discussing eternity.)
Osama: Seen any virgins since you got here, Bro'?
Osama: What? None?
Saddam: No, none.
Osama: I don't know, Brother. Sometimes I wonder what it's all about.
Saddam: What what's all about?
Osama: This martyrdom thingy. They said there were going to be virgins.
Saddam: I wouldn't worry about it if I were you.
Osama: Wouldn't worry about it? Of course I worry about it.
Saddam: As I say... I wouldn't worry about it. Brother Muammar will be here before long. He'll know where to find them.
Osama: What? The virgins?
Saddam: Yep... The virgins, Brother.