Saturday 3 April 2010

Lord Mandelson attacks famous bank robber

Lord Mandelson has launched a scathing attack on one of Britain's best loved bank robbers branding him the "unacceptable face of organised crime."

The business secretary said today, "I have always been intensely relaxed about the likes of 'Diamond Bob' and his safe-cracking capers. He reminded me of those eccentric characters in the Italian job played by Noel Coward and Michael Caine.

"And for a long time we tolerated the antics of such men, believing they added a touch of glamour to the otherwise stuffy world of investment banking. But after they almost wiped out the global financial system with their explosive credit derivatives back in 2008, all I can say is: You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!"